2day... weather super fine
feeling also very beautiful although it was nt when i go sch
cause a bit tired....
beautiful because i found a new way 2 convince myself nt 2 care abt other things except my project n studies
beautiful also because there r actually ppl who cared abt my feelings
beautiful also because i m so used 2 being alone tt i dun care wat had happened the past few days
beautiful also because if ppl wan 2 talk 2 me i will listen if nt i will nt bother 2 even talk 2 them

i dun care if my post is being read or wat
this is just a place 4 me express my feelings
its like going 2 the beach n shouting out loud
i dun need ppl 2 talk 2 me just because they pity me
i dun need ppl 2 pity me n i dun wan it
if u think i m trying 2 get sympathy then u can just get out of my blog

moving on 2 my studies>>>>
2day gt a new project from PD on creative thinking
sianzzz sia cause we will be working on a parachute tt can hold a tennis ball n stay in the air 4 the longest time
did nt gp with the gurls this time round cause they all yr 2 de
so i gp with weasley, nic n ????(cant rmb his name sia...lolz)
think going 2 ask them when they wan 2 do it cause it is due next thurs!!!!!
ltr went 4 maths lec.....did nt really focus cause feeling very sian so i use my laptop 2 surf the net but at the same time copy down notes...hehe
dunno y recently like tt during maths lec....m i too confident???
then ltr ate lunch n went 4 tutorial then after tt went 2 look 4 shakila 2 do some project discussion....
after tt went 4 project tutorial n continue discussion n ask tcher 4 opinion n improve the idea
still stuck with the bookshop auntie pg...haizzzz
the bookshop auntie so ma fan...lolz
then rush home 2 eat dinner......i reach home earlier than my mum who went out 2 buy dinner
after tt chat 4 a while then rest 4 a while more then blogging now
dunno y suddenly feel so high.....
maybe this is wat they call fast recovery system.....
hahahahahhahhahaha

recently had been very tired n exhausted due 2 the ongoing tests n assignments
then had been emotionally unstable
dunno is me being too sensitive or izzit tt in reality i m being neglected
in situations like this i really feel like looking up on my horoscope 2 see if i m so unlucky this wk or its just nt my wk
haizzzz...

had a sluggish feeling which is nt very gd.....
it felt as if i hav no frens so i must stick ard with them....so nt gd feeling la
n some more they totally ignored, isolate, treat me as invisible...etc
anything u can think of after being treated like tt
then they like totally dun care how i feel at all
its as if i m an extra, nt wanted, dun belong, should nt be there at all
aaaaarrrrrggggggg......
i hate all those ppl who gave me hopes n then totally ignored me like i m an object like tt
in need then will look 4 it or else will be left on the shelf collecting dust
they also seem 2 be keeping something from me
like they r talking something i cant get 2 noe or like talking my bad word like tt

n the more irratating part is tt we cant even communicate properly during project discussion
they will like be in their own world looking at other stuffs which i cant even enter
its like i m shut out of their palace like a begger......
how come things always turn out this way whenever i start 2 trust someone

sometimes i really wonder if it is me who nv try 2 enter their world,
if i nv try 2 get into their topic of discussion,
or just plainly i m treated like an outcast

this made me feel like nt turning up 4 lesson in sch cause i dun feel belonged
its like nt a single one in class acknowledge my presence
i felt so lost.... its like wandering ard some unknown place
up 2 here, it made me feel tt i fit into fei lun hai's song yi ge ren liu lang

anyway, now talk abt my studies
gt asp n dcn test 2day n yesterday respectively
then was also rushing report with no one caring how i do it or i can manage it anot
then nv sleep at all n rush down 2 sch straightaway to rush printing n last min editing
n ms shirley called me 2 ask abt nic??? cause he absent too often 4 her lesson
told her all i noe n she hung up... she is a very nice tcher like ms sin

dunno y now i feel like crying n shouting out loud
it feels like no one cares abt me.....
had the feeling of nt taking my medicine n just die cause no one cares if i live or die

2day i m feeling very tired n sian
cause i did nt get 2 enjoy my weekend at all
need 2 keep searching 4 info 4 the comm skill report writing
then ltr still must complete the project proposal
the worst is i haven find anyone 2 help me do the survey...haizzz
luckily i found my way out by asking ppl online
hope tt this last min work can help me pass up the report on time

did nt go 4 CO prac on fri because very tired n down with flu
ltr went home eat le then sleep until saturday morning
maybe because thurs gt a serious headache tt led me 2 become so tired
i cant even concentrate during lessons on fri
then worse, fri gt java test so i just try my luck
hope i can pass the test
then this wk still gt test
haizzzzz...so fast it has reached the test season again
hope tt i will nt go crazy this time round

reach sch @ 8.15am so straight away go lab cause nv bring laptop
then went 2 edit my blog n change my tagboard
after tt went 2 check my sch email n waited 4 them 2 come
while waiting 4 them i went 2 view the blogskins recently added
ltr tcher came n he teach us how 2 do our assignment
but then nt really very helpful as he nv teach us how 2 do the most diff one
he say we need 2 think through first...haizzzz
then ate lunch but suddenly gt stomachache
nv tell them cause dun wan them 2 feel tt i m seeking their attention
then went 2 tutorial rm 2 wait 4 them while i try 2 do the java tut
then java lec b4 1hr break then his lec again...
he then teach us how 2 do the assignment AGAIN!!!!
cause gt other classes as well.....
then he say tml dun hav his tut so is like i travel 4 2hrs 2 attend a 2hr lesson n go home
wasting time sia....haizzz
now very bored....did a bit of the remaining assignments le but still nt complete
then now watching csi.....dozzing offf

dunno wth go tag my blog n say wat i anyhow shoot ppl
where gt lor....
then some more put the name as anonymous
really hav no idea who i shot in my blog lor
since when i shot someone on my blog???
dunno y i reply back... maybe because too angry le
really very curious who did i shot n who is tis person who tag me
dunno whether i was too harsh with my use of words
dun care le cause wats done cannot be undone
then now make me so curious n mad la....aaaaaahhhhhhhhh

yesterday did nth again!!!!!!!
omg..... play audi the whole day
excluding the time used to watch bridge to tarabitha n spiderman 3
then at night try some maths but then dunno how to do so giv up
slept at ard 1am if i am nt wrong cause cant seem 2 fall asleep
so now really very tired
going 2 watch some videos b4 they come back from their marketing

this whole wk is e-learning wk which is like so sian la
then i slack the whole wk
did a bit of hw here n there but still haven finish

mon
no mood 2 do hw at so play all day
after tt did a bit of java prac
then slack the whole day
slept at 1.30am cause the cms can only work at late night

tue
also slack the whole day by playing game
but i gt bring out all my lec notes
cause i will 4gt every hw if i dun put it within my sight
then 2day also the same
slept at 1.30am cause the cms can only work at late night

wed
bake cookies 2day after i ate my breakfast
then did nt really do anything but stay up late again
cause of the cms
then realized tt i haven do the discussion forumn yet
but did nt do it right away cause i dun really understand the qn

thurs
did a bit more of my hw
but then did nt finish the one tt i am supposed to hand up to tcher
so i am a bit like mad cause the one tt i am supposed to hand up is very difficult de
n some more i haven study for my test yet
i think having e-learning is even worse than normal schooling hrs

2day
went 4 bloodtest early this morning
then went 2 TM 2 meet my relatives 2 eat lunch
after tt came home n rest 4 a while b4 going 4 CO prac
quite slack cause nt much ppl here
so i went 2 eat dinner n when i came back
ed n ying hui had already arrived
however they did nt 4gt their nonsense
they even started a new one n i am super mad abt it
but i dun care abt them cause they r jokers....(get it jokers....if u ever see my blog)
i cant help getting angry 4 being make fun at cause i dun like the feeling of getting pick on 4 jokes but still at least it shows tt i am their fren tts y they play pranks
i am nt going 2 write down wat they say cause all those who were present 2day have heard it so no pt writing somthing they already hear
but one thing 4 sure is i am going 2 make ying hui pay if he dare 2 do anything 2 ruin my reputation...lolz sounds like i am going 2 kill someone like tt...hahaz
tts all 4 now... going 2 do the discussion forumn now....sianzz

the worst day ever
maths lesson was cancelled due tcher food-poisoning
then i was like he sure noe how 2 pick time 2 food poison la
reach sch so early then say he gt food poison
after tt i spent my whole 3hrs playing games
mc nv come 2day cause she too tired i think
then ltr lunch we at the chicken rice from grinning gecko
nice n filling then go 4 prac all the way until 4pm
then we parted as i rush down 2 CO n realized tt i was early so i went window shopping at white sands n found a inuyasha puzzle but nt very nice
went 2 CO prac after tt n realized there was commotion inside
bryan was practicing like mad...because he flying off 2 japan 4 performance
then belinda was singing no more sorrow again n again
then i realized wat happen
she said she won a pair of linkin park concert tics 4 her 'fren'
then now her 'fren' dunno is dun need or dun wan so the tics is like wasted
so she is asking ard who wan 2 go
then dunno wat happen we were talking abt her mc
all of us were like asking her 2 rest then she dun wan
then she showed us her mc n wan xuan snatched it from her
then she say wat she wan 2 lanminate her mc which made us laugh like mad
then i even went on further 2 say maybe she should frame it n write year 2007 first time fall sick which made everybody almost roll on the floor
tts entertainment 2 us cause we can finally make her stop her no more sorrow singing
then i went 2 prac my exam pieces
but 4 a while only cause bryan wan 2 prac so i let him
then the edmund n ying hui keep disturbing me la
but i mastered the art of ignoring so did nt get really irratated
then ltr dunno wat happen, wan xuan suddenly angry
found out from belinda tt she was angry with the ones nt practicing
n at the same time, edmund n ying hui smuggle sweet talk inside the CO rm
(sry la....i dunno writing it out gt betray u all anot...lolz)
then me, wan xuan n vicki decided 2 go eat supper cause a bit hungry le
then we packed up...then all those who nv prac de also packed up which made wan xuan even more angry la.... then she say she is nt giving them any cip points if they dun prac
bryan took back his guzheng 2day also
but the way he carry it really make everybody laugh
then reg still say wat siam ar siam ar... so funny
in the end nv go eat supper cause wan xuan no mood le
so all of us went home....

another long time nv blog le
so going 2 try 2 keep tis post as short as possible



i cant really rmb wat happen last wk
but one thing 4 sure is tt i suddenly gt so angry with my frens
it happen on thurs after my elective
i thought i found it strange tt they were earlier than me
then i realized tt it was me who was late
after tt we went in 4 maths lec
tx nv come because of wat reason i also cant rmb le
but she came 4 the project lesson
b4 tt, we were chatting outside the lab
i thought tt they were all weird weird de
like they dun wan me 2 tok 2 them like tt
keep ignoring me then i finally cannot take it le
so i went out of the tut rm 2 get a hold of myself of my temper
then when mr yong tok 2 us abt our idea how it is nt gd or something like tt
i was trying very hard 2 prevent from showing my angry feeling
after tt i went out of the rm when the lesson ends
it so happen tt shakila was left behind alone
i totally 4got tt she always walk out of sch with me
so when i gt her sms i was shock
i just explained tt i m very angry n i dun wan 2 quarrel with them so i went out of sch earlier on my own


fri was even more horrible
dunno y i keep having tis angry feeling inside me
when mq came i ignored her totally
i did nt tok 2 tx n mc as well
i was like alone 4 the whole day in sch
then went 4 CO prac feeling very angry n lonely
luckily there is vicki who cheer me up a bit la
the one who cheer me up the most is bryan's guzheng
dunno y when i focus on practicing my exam piece
i feel tt i can 4gt a lot of things even though there is bryan there who will keep stressing me with my an yin n rythmn of the piece
did nt eat supper tt day cause everyone too tired le so all went home


tis mon
prensentation of our idea 2 the class
it sux like hell cause our idea nt very gd lor
i feel like digging a hole in the ground can!!
SO LAO KUI LA
then after tt mum called 2 ask me where i put the piece of internet contact
so i went out 2 ans her call
my actions were seen by ms sin who happened 2 be at the other side of the prac rm
then we carry on thinking of new ideas until lesson ends
then went 2 eat with shakila cause they all gt their own programs after project lesson
then after eating, i went 2 novena with shakila 2 show her the way 2 buy the donuts
after tt i went hospital 2 get the 24hr urine bottle
bought donuts also then went home
reach home quite early so play with the new mio tv controls
watch curse of the golden flower
nt very nice show.... its like the main topic is showing off the boobs of all the lady-in -waiting
the only thing i can understand abt tis movie is tt the empress is trying 2 kill the emperor
n she has an affair with the eldest son of the emperor
summary

all the sons died in the end n the show ended with jay chou killing himself in order nt 2 serve her mum the poison medicine n ju hua tai as the ending song
no meaning at all or should i say i dunno how 2 appreciate


tue

super long lesson day
tired is the word tt i can say
one more thing... still feels like i m an extra
2day no need 2 go 2 sch so early cause the 2hr prac is cancelled
mq reach the lecture threater first
can sense tt she a bit werid but said nth
then talk abt wat happen last wk
then she say they also a bit moody tt day tts y
2day chatting like a bit werid de or should i say fake??
cause like i m toking nonsense
no mood 2 study after lunch so quite sian
reach home quite late de cause the bus a bit slow

yesterday
comm skills.......
showed tcher our topic n he approved
then all tt is left 2 do is the research 4 the report writing
after comm skills, gt DCN tut
tcher said tt wk 6 gt presentation 4 our project idea
i dunno wat 2 do lor
our ideas gt rejected then i dunno can present wat idea le
stayed back 2 do our comm skill report writing research
but none of us in the mood 2 do any more cause like wan 2 go home liao
so i went 2 city hall 2 wait 4 bro n mum 2 come out
shopped 4 my mp3 charger n stick-on
then went on 2 search 4 bro's sport shoes
but in the end only found a suitable one at TM...lolz
ate dinner at suntec first b4 moving on 2 TM 2 shop
the raman tt me n my bro eat was horrible
next time nt eating tt stall raman again

2day
no sch cause deepavali
so did a bit of hw n trying 2 do the project research
then play game all the way
wasting time cause really no mood
my uncle came 2day 2 watch transformers
he ate dinner with us cause the movie too long le
then i bought myself marble cake 4 my dinner tml